A mother’s faith pays off in the end

“RAISING young children without a father is like piggybacking your camping gear towards the peak of Mt Everest without a guide,” says a 45-year-old single mother. Shock, total confusion and trauma marred Betty Tolao Yandi’s life when she lost her promising lover in a tragic car accident in 1995. She could hardly bear the agony, and imagine the imminent struggles that awaited on life’s pathway. “I got the shock of my life when he died.

I was alone and felt it was the end of the world. I just could not believe that my husband, the kids’ dad , had gone too quickly in such a manner. It was just unbelievable,” she said.Betty, of Tsak Valley, Enga Province was the charming wife of a handsome pastor. His name was Yandi Pop of Ogelbeng village, near Mt Hagen. They met at an evangelical crusade at Warakum, Western Highlands, during Christmas of 1992 and officially tied the knot the following year.

(Betty Talao Yandi with her children at Ogelbeng, near Mount Hagen City, WHP)

They had been married happily for 12 years until Yandi’s demise. The pain was irresistible and unforgettable as he left behind four little beauties and a cute baby boy in her care. The kids ranged from one year to 11 years of age.Betty was then a professional teacher, a 32-year-old blonde who could have easily taken one of the many directions in life. She could have given out the kids for adoption or dumped them with relatives and searched for greener pastures in a second marriage, as many women do today.But she thought she had a mission to accomplish. And that responsibility was to raise her children on a solid foundation based on Christian principles as their father would have loved. “I was educated enough to realise that the kids growing up under my own care as a biological parent was a better option.

Many guys expressed their interest in me because I was a young widow then but I opted to stick with God and raise the kids,” she says.Betty reiterated she did not have one bit of interest in a second marriage adding that is against God’s wishes. She also did not prefer to marry a second time because she realised that men would only be interested in her alone and not her kids, as they would remain another man’s children.“If you are a widow…be so and remain so because that’s your identity. You must remain to face the challenges that come with it,” she added.The loneliness did not matter. Betty finally overcame the trials and promised to live straight and narrow with her children. She decided to raise her children; Belinda then 11, Lydia 9, Rachael 7, Grace 5 and baby Emmanuel who was just 1.

Through thick and thin, they managed to survive under one roof and on a lone pay packet. Sometimes, the girls could recall living solely on green bananas (rua mata in the local Melpa dialect) or go without food a whole day. Betty moved to a new home, a shanty at Hagen Tech and started enrolling the kids at various schools. As the girls became teenagers and reached education levels from high to secondary levels, the mother’s net salary of K250 could not to sustain the entire family. So Betty made the toughest decision in her life, and with the approval of her girls, she resigned from active teaching in 2003.

“When I saw that my pay was insufficient to feed, clothe, pay school fees, provide lunch and meet other basic needs, I had no other option but to humbly resign from teaching and fully commit myself to God. I wanted to do pastoral work on a full-time basis on an understanding that God would redeem us from our financial problems,” she said.Many people including friends, relatives and colleagues thought Betty was crazy and had made the worst decision, adding her job was the big family’s only lifeline. But Betty was not wrong. God finally intervened in His own way.

He immediately became the provider and supplier. And Betty’s hardest decision paid off handsomely. “My mother made the best choice to serve God. Because God is real! I saw His miraculous hands,” says second daughter Lydia who has just completed her studies at the University of Technology in Lae. The 22-year-old Jika Opromb lass will be graduating later in March, majoring in applied physics with electronics and instrumentation. With God’s everlasting grace, Lydia plans to venture into the working field and produce the desired results.

She also aims to specialize in one field and become a doctor after writing her own circuit designs.In a heart-to-heart public oration at her village Wanka, where a feast was hosted in her honour, Lydia tearfully recalled the hardships she had faced without the love of a father. Lydia said even though there were many Good Samaritans along their life’s pathways, she acknowledged that her mother was the prime tower of strength for her and her siblings.“But I thank God because He was everything in our lives. I wouldn’t have been here today if it wasn’t for God’s grace and protection,” Lydia said.“With God’s wisdom, my mother was a father. She was a he and a woman possessing the abilities of a man.

That’s through God alone,” she added.Rachael, the third daughter will be doing her second year in business management at the University of PNG. Rachael has been, and will continue to be fostered by oil and gas tycoon Martha Kaia in Port Moresby. The final of the girls, Grace will do her first year at University of Technology in Lae. While appreciating God’s tender care and guidance in their upbringing, the girls have unanimously decided to offer their eldest sister, Belinda to God. Belinda has enrolled at the Theological College at Christian Leaders Training College (CLTC) at Banz, Western Highlands. She will serve as an overseas missionary, probably in Australia next year once she has completed her training.

This family will rise to stardom because of their mother’s wise decisions. They are the replica of their strict upbringing. They are all devoted, have charismatic qualities and are inspirational examples of those kids from broken families out there. All these “Jiks Ambes” will remain the true champions in their community because they possess great stamina and determination.

Anybody out there wishing to know more about these girls can contact Lydia on 728 55746 or email yandigrace@yahoo.com.

*** Betty Talao Yandi’s story is one of the many success stories that come at the end of much pain and hardships and that's a testimony to many 'mamas' around PNG and the world who commit themselves to the welbeing of their families; especially the children and their education. I would say; it is a bold move taken by mothers but it is a step in the right direction. May God contimue to bless The Yandi family. Go Jiks Ambes!


Source: Post Courier Weekender