Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Understanding Man


By Alison Armstrong * (www.hopetv.org ) (www.keepingthefaith.tv)

There could actually be a time when women can actually understand a man.

l When he talks - don’t interrupt


l When he is talking - It’s like he is taking a train. Brut brut,.. brut, brut… coming through

l When we talk and he does not respond quick enough, we then rephrase it – that is wrong

l We need to give him at least 30 seconds to let him to think

l Wait 30 seconds longer

l He needs time
l Think of him like a BIG WELL

l He needs all the energy and time to heave the bucketful of water up

l Put an imaginary duct tape on your lips

l If you wait long enough – they actually get emotional – they really do

l They actually communicate from the depth of them

l Women responding to our environment like it’s urgent

l Everything is screaming at us when we enter a living room saying fix me.

l We take in everything around the scene.

l Whereas, if a man is going from A to B, he can step around something in order to get to his B, he notices enough about things around him but he is focused on getting to his target.

l For men - It does not register as ‘something to do’.

l Men are slow to focus.

l In society now – we ‘male bash’ all the time

l Men have a higher opinion of women than we have of ourselves and each other

l They need us and they try not to not need us.

l We try to not need them – it’s funny isn’t it?

l There are 3 masculine factors – self-sufficiency, - independence, - self-confidence

l Women are like chameleons

l We change to suit men - but we don’t understand the cost

l Men have (16x) more testosterone than women

l When women try to put on masculine behavior like when we are working in a male environment, we pull the testosterone from the adrenal glands so we crash.

l We eat sugar; try and pump us up again (like ice-creams, cakes - men don’t need that)

l We’re literally working against our own bodies

Why Men Want To be our Heroes?

l 1) It’s much more than ‘want’ – it is actually an integral part of men


l 2) If you got a man, you got a Hero. You cannot separate them.

l “A man wants to one day be a hero and be found to be a hero”, quoted from the husband of the author who came in the show as a guest.

l In war, Men are not afraid of death, they are afraid of failing their country or their colleagues, their friends.

Four (4) Qualities in a Woman that Men Find Irresistible
(they (qualities) last the duration of a relationship)

l If a woman continues this, he will continue to be “Charmed & Enchanted”, author calls it.


l When Men catch us, we women change, & they respond to us differently.


l So, the four (4) Qualities are:

1) Self-confidence – (difficult because we have this idea that tells us what’s wrong.

2) Authentic (being Real) – be authentic about your feelings if you are not self-confident) If you’re feeling not right about something, just say, “Honey, I am not feeling self-confident right now. & he will feel sorry

3) Passion (could be being passionate about anything, shopping, gardening, cooking, drawing, whatever)

l Woman’s voice is processed in a man’s voice like music.

l It gives them testosterone spike

l It’s really like music to a man’s brain (The author’s husband says: “All right” – actually agreeing
l By not letting men make us happy

l Men cannot marry a woman they cannot make happy.

l They leave women, when they cannot make them happy & they even say when leaving “ you deserve a man who can make you happy”

4) Receptivity – the ability to receive.

l 1) We need to be receptive to men’s gifts. 2) We need to receive them

l “They (men) were really well made” – “they were made in His image”


* Alison Armstrong - In her early 40’s, very attractive and young-looking. She was married and had a son, then got divorced. She thought that men change after they have got you and decided that she was never going to get caught again. But after some years, she did want to get caught. So she did get caught and is now married but spent 15 years studying “How to Know Men.

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